Picture of Love

Question from chapter 2: “Does the picture of love as a way of ‘being with’ fit into what you have experienced in your life?”

Willard uses the picture of a small child who loves doing things with his parents as the basis for his discussion of love as a way of “being with.” The child, maybe even unknowingly, relishes the time he spends with his parents no matter what they do; yet if the child were alone he may not seek to engage in the same activities because without the parent, it’s not the same. Every Christmas I have to make cutout cookies with my mom; it’s just a requirement I have. Now I don’t go and make sugar cookies any other time of the year; in fact, I’ve never made cutouts on my own. I love doing this activity with my mom because we always have and it means a lot.

Willard also uses the analogy of a loving couple, who when in sync with each other, do not need to demand or control the other’s actions; they just do things for each other out of love. Cleaning, dishes, gifts, positive words, etc all naturally happen with Clare and I because we seek to show our love in action. Although, this too can be upset. When an action is taken by one of us that doesn’t get the response we might have thought it would, the “being with” factor is affected.

Many times it can be the same with God. He does not communicate every aspect of His will to us for He longs for us to reach for it on our own sometimes as evidence of our love for Him. Yet often we look for a response from Him after our actions as a way to confirm our movements. When they don’t happen exactly how we expect them, our “being with” feeling of love is often altered. We need to reach past our pre-determined responses and seek to love God in spite of not hearing Him. And then maybe we truly will understand what He is speaking to us.